I had a very tumultuous day today. I tried to distract myself with a book and was only rewarded with vanity. Rarely before had my confusion been so fierce. I feel dizzy for it.
The thought of going offline has been playing with my senses for a quite a while, but today the urge’s been unbearably strong. And I am officially afraid for my health. Friday was a kind day to me, but then things went downhill again. I never imagined I’d suffer this much when I’m alone with that head of mine.
Now listen. I know I’m not entitled to ask for personal favors from any of you, and I kind of believe that me writing words for you to read across all these years doesn’t really merit the compassion I might imagine it should, but today I have this one honest, sincere wish: pray for me. And no, not in your head. I beg of you to actually pray with words for me, my health, my sanity and guidance from Him, not in a comment, not in a message, and not while you’re reading this, but while your forehead is on the ground.
I really can’t put in words how much I need that. I really really can’t.
Hard times for the ibhog.